What are some funny and smart quotes?

Last Updated: 01.07.2025 04:57

What are some funny and smart quotes?

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

Astronomers discover a mysterious object in space emitting an X-ray signal every 44 minutes - Notebookcheck

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

When did bestiality first occur to you and how did it happen the first time? Was it a deliberate decision or it just happened and you allowed it?

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

My wife found I had been on Pornhub. She considers this adultery and wants a divorce. She hasn't touched me in over 6 years. What should I do?

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”